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Life (finally) in the moment

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I’ve been trying for literally my entire adulthood to slow down my mindset.

All throughout my youth and well into adulthood my mind has been absorbed on setting/accomplishing goals, thoughts of achievement, unique ideas and rummaging through the best ideas for possibilities. My mind is been literally abused over and over again, day after day, in the hustle and bustle of society. In the realm of it all, I have tried countless amount of times to study my thoughts to understand how to think less.

It’s a genetic trait in my family; the overthinking. My brother, my mother and my younger sister are all over thinkers. We never stop thinking, ever. In fact, often times, we think so much that we forget what we are saying often. This may sound familiar.

Regardless if there are genetics involved or not, it’s safe to say that society has become so fast-paced that literally everyone has become an over thinker by now. One simple example, we multitask more so nowadays, both men and women. It’s likely that over half of your daily activities include some realm of multitasking; doing two or three different things at once. This is common, especially in this day and age.

Society has bread us to be over thinkers. It’s made us think quicker, react quicker and get over things quicker. There are some positives overthinking, but, in the realm of happiness, overthinking does not serve a purpose. It actually defeats the purpose itself.

It’s been scientifically proven that women are more the overthinking type breed of humanity, but even men can be extreme over thinkers. As mentioned, my brother is quite the over thinker. If he isn’t thinking about how he can increase his revenue in business, he is thinking of ways he can spend money hasn’t even earned yet. His mind just never stops.I t’s the same with many of my colleagues, including myself.

Over the years, I’ve tried to utilize my overthinking as leverage to catapult my career, my relationships, pretty much everything in my life, but, sadly, I came to conclusion later in life that overthinking just leads to more frustration, more stress and sickness. There’s really no point to utilize it at all anymore in my life. I’ve realized that it really just gets in the way of my happiness.

My wife is a yoga instructor. She teaches prenatal yoga to expecting mothers. Sadly, I never really got into yoga myself. I really never thought there was much of a need for it in my life, nor did I feel that I was the “yoga type” person. Even today, the term ‘yoga’ seems a little too modern – a little too “hipster” for me. But, that doesn’t mean that yoga is an excellent activity to eliminate overthinking.

I decided recently to contradict my own thoughts and reasoning and did some yoga with my wife. As I made the initial effort in asking my wife to teach me some yoga, she looked at me as though I was an alien from outer space. She didn’t think that I had the interest in her hobby enough to pursue it. But, after she knew I wasn’t joking, she leapt to the closet and grabbed her yoga gear. The exercise was actually quite enlightening.

In the days before this exercise, I had serious troubles trying to stabilize my thoughts. I tried numerous breathing exercises, I tried to meditate here and there, and I never could seem to stabilize my thoughts. It bothered me how I couldn’t even slow my mind down for a simple 30 seconds. For about two weeks last year, as I got into the shower every morning I tried to meditate and slow my mind down, but I couldn’t get further than 25 seconds.

As I listened to my wife’s soothing voice as she taught me yoga that day, I reflected on my recent approach to my breathing exercises, but this time I didn’t focus on my inability to meditate. This time I focussed on nothing. I didn’t let my thoughts interacts with the practice. I just let myself be. And, for a moment much longer than 30 seconds I was able to meditate and thoroughly enjoy the moment, breathing peacefully.

The moral of my story; I never thought that I could slow my thoughts down. I just thought overthinking was a part of who I was and who I have become. I thought genetics were over taking my mentality and I just had to accept that I was an over thinker.

This one yoga exercise, although it was only an introduction to stabilize in my thoughts, I’m more confident today that I’m able to slow my thoughts down more frequently with practice. I guess anything really as possible if you just set your mind to it. Now, to slow my mind down again …

There’s no pride in multitasking or overthinking. It’s only gets in the way with your happiness. When you focus on more than one task you’d be better focusing on nothing.

 

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