Try changing it up a bit
It’s the 24th of January. By this time most of us have given up on our New Years resolutions. Although we’ve tried to succumb to better reasoning – a better life, there are just so many distraction and responsibilities standing in the way of this type of reasoning.
Within my 18 year career as a youth motivator, I’ve questioned literally every aspect about our lives, mostly surrounding the theme of finding happiness. From my observations, I’ve learned to understand that, often times, the reason why we cannot move forward is because we have the improper expectations.
As we set out into the new year, we anticipate more excitement, more enjoyment and a better life. This intertwines with our current perceptions (of a boring complacent life), and, often times, it doesn’t take long into the new year to become bored again with our lives and ourselves. We then give up on our New Years resolutions and the things that were once important to us.
It’s wise to do some inner spiritual healing every now and then. Perhaps it’s time to take a look at your own inner feelings and justify whether your actions are in line with your values and beliefs. The best way to do this is by re-adjusting your expectations.
Although change is never an easy thing to go through, it’s quite often exactly what’s needed for you to move on from what’s been holding you back in life.
Re adjusting your expectations is an easy way to change your life up. I mean, take a look at your current reality right now. Are you bored of your life? Is your lifestyle stale and complacent? The hobbies and activities that you pursue; are they fulfilling enough? All of these answers will be defined when you rethink and readjust your expectations.
Re-adjusting your expectations
The simplest way to do this exercise is to find a nice quiet comfortable place in your household – kitchen, bedroom, wherever you can get some peace and quiet.
When you find an ample room to do this exercise, take out a pad of paper and a pen and divide your page up into five or six different categories, or more. I like to keep it simple at first, and then when you get used to this project you can elaborate further.
Your exercise might look slightly different than mine,
You can start with labeling each category with labels like these – hobbies, family, relationship, business, school, happiness, household, etc. Chose to label your categories similar to the characteristics that you wish to readjust. For example, if you know that your hobbies are stale and you’re really complacent at work, maybe you’ll want to write down “hobbies” and “business” – this way you will focus more so on these areas rather than another area that you’re quite happy with and doesn’t need to be adjusted.
Next, write down, in point form, all of your current expectations within each category. For example, in the category of “business”, you might write down things like this; complacent, not enough enjoyment, no opportunity, etc. These labels will trigger the points of unhappiness and point out which areas you perhaps need to re-adjust your expectations. Try to find at least five different points for each category.
Next, with your fully written activity in front of you, as you look at the page, take the time to readjust your thinking towards each category. For example, in the business category, you might look at the terms “no opportunity” or “complacent”, and you might find areas to pursue more enjoyment in that area. You might perhaps replace “no opportunity” with “find another job” or “do something I enjoy”.
This exercise will help you to find where your happiness is derived and where its lacking. This should inspire some positive thought about you can change your lifestyle up a little bit, and how are you can find more enjoyment.
Often times, we need to change the way we think before we can actually change the activity. This activity is a great way to inspire this type of mental change.
Next, keep this activity present in your mind for a least 20 days. Post it on your bathroom mirror if you like. Py attention to the type of thoughts you put into each category during your days. Write your thoughts down if needed.
Although, this does take some time to actually take full effect, when you are able to re-adjust your expectations it should encourage you to continue your pursuit towards being a better person and finding more happiness.
Lastly, focus on all the things you can do to increase your happiness. Now that you’ve written your expectations of what you expect in your life. from business, school, from your family/friends, and everything in between, now you won’t get let down as much as you have in the past because you no longer harness the same emotional connection to it.
Life is so much more enjoyable when you have less expectations.
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