I remember when I first became a parent. There were tons of great emotions, a few sleepless nights, but the thing that I remember the most was all the criticism and parenting advice I used to get from literally everyone. It used to drive me nuts how complete strangers would point out parenting mistakes, or they would get right into our conversation and explain why their method of parenting was superior. It took me some time to differentiate advice from others compared to my own ways but I eventually learned to understand what good parenting meant. Here are my thoughts.
When it comes to parenting everyone has their own style. There are no perfectly right or wrong answers in the parenting playbook. It all depends on the values and beliefs that are instilled into the core of the family. Some families prefer certain parenting methods because they are more in line with their family values. Whereas, other methods work better for certain families because their values and beliefs are more congruent with that specific action. Either way, there isn’t a guaranteed or proper way of doing it. It all depends on a family-to-family basis.
I strongly believe that children need a lot of attention. Yes, teaching them life lessons is important, but the attention that I’m talking about is just regular attention to their interests. Children want to be heard, they want to show you what they’ve learned, and they want to interact differently than just playing with toys alone while you’re at work. They need a considerable amount of attention. They need to see that you show an interest in them. In fact, the more attention you spend on them the more love they’ll harness in their hearts. Plus, they’ll see life in a much healthier perspective when they have your attention and interest. Your interest in them shows that you care.
Studies have shown recently that the average parent spends less than 20 minutes on each of their children per day. This is substantially less then I would recommend. Think about it. It takes a lot longer than 20 minutes to take a child swimming, to help them with homework, to throw around the ball outside, or even just a regular daily task like bathing. Often times, parents are consumed too much within their own lives. They stare at their iPads, phones and computers all day, addicted to social media and online shopping. Or, they spent too much time at the office, working overtime, or spending time with their friends. When you become a parent you need to realize your life will not be the same in any way. You need to realize that most your time will be spent on parenting your children. You need to let go of the comfort you used to seek in your past and focus on creating new habits of comfort in your new current reality – with children.
If you really want to become a good parent then spend time with your kids. Play outside rather than watching TV indoors. Go to the swimming pool once a week, or go the play center down the street every now and then. Good quality time can be spent indoors at home too. If you gonna spend time consumed in front of your computer screen search for good crafts are fun things you can do with your children. When you’ve got this covered’s you’ll be a better parent than 90% of the population.
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