Searching for Happiness
After all my research in understanding humanity over the years; through my career as a motivator, researching nearly every religion, having discussions with every aged individual within literally every race across the continent I’ve learned what life is all about; why we are here. What’s truly important.
There are a plethora of different perspectives of what life is and how we can thrive in it however it all boils down to the same characteristics. We are here to find our happiness.
In the midst of my research into finding happiness I became more aware of myself; my inner beliefs. I had realized I harnessed a tainted view of society. After seeing all the wrath from the negativity in my surroundings over the years it caused me to weaken my mindset entirely. My overall perspective of life was completely different than how I had seen it before, in a much more negative way. The sadder thing was; I had seen the same with all my loved ones too. It became apparent to me that everyone else around me harnessed a similar tainted view of reality.
I came to realize that everything they (the people I had discussions about life with) said was true; life is all about living in the moment. That’s what they kept saying.
At first, it was a tough pill to swallow; to realize that happiness is actually much simpler to achieve than I initially understood. I used to think flashy cars, stacks of cash, even spending most of my time perfecting my website or doing whatever I needed to be better at business was going to make me happy. All the while, my entire pursuit was leading me to an unhappy mindset, something completely opposite of where I wanted. I came to this conclusion after trying this very lesson that I’m passing onto you today.
It became apparent to me that neither of us are truly happy people. Even though we all harness the same characteristics needed to generate long lasting happiness, neither of us are truly 100% happy all the time. In coming to terms with this knowledge, I started gaining a clear perspective of reality; what life is, what is truly important, and it allowed me to gain a more truthful perspective. I then realized that happiness is strictly a choice, that’s it.
Often times, we look at happiness and we instantly think certain outside characteristics like fame, fortune or materialistic possessions and financial wealth are essential in attaining it. We learned to understand this through our associations with other people. Even passion seems like it’s crucial to generate true lasting happiness. You would be surprised that the opposite is true.
We often lose sense of ourselves; we lose track of who we are, or we get thrown off our path toward spiritual enlightenment because we strive for the same things as our closest influences. Or, we get so caught up in our passions meanwhile blinding ourselves to the other possibilities. If we were to refocus our attention on the other parts of reality we would perhaps be happier people.
Our influences have helped shape our perspective of reality entirely since our birth. Think about it; how many times have you sought literally the exact same goal, the exact same position, the same possessions, or strive for the exact same ambitions as your friends or siblings or parents? You’ll come to realize that most of your everyday thoughts are derived from our closest influences. The way they see life is literally the same way you see it.
Your closest influences are a direct reflection of how you perceive reality. The problem is; the majority of them have a tainted perspective of reality. And, they do things differently because of this. Often times it leads them exactly opposite of where they want to be. You don’t want to fall into this trap.
Although passion, personal growth in the roles we serve in society, financial wealth and the like are important fundamentals to reaching fulfillment, they aren’t crucial to experiencing long lasting true happiness. Happiness is 100% derived through living in the moment, that’s it.
I tried fulfilling my happiness through fulfilling my passions for many years. I spent literally a decade and a half trying to pursue everything on my business bucket list. Yes I experienced many pleasures in doing so, but it became clear to me that my pursuit in business only increased my desire for more. It often took me away from the important things in life like spending time with my family and loved ones. In addition, I was rarely satisfied with who I was regardless of how many accomplishments I had under my belt. I always wanted more. More was never enough.
I’m not saying that fulfilling your passions isn’t going to lead you to your ultimate happiness. I’m simply saying NOT to only search where your passions lie on your pursuit to attaining it. A healthy balance is key.
If we were all to just focus on the now; what we are doing at this very moment, and do that as often as we possibly can we would be more in line with living happy filled lives. But, we all fail to do so.
We all have materialistic wants and desires. These are all external things that contribute to but aren’t necessary in the realm of living happily. Often times, more materialistic things means more stress and frustration. How many times have you purchased something and instantly you regretted buying it. These materialistic things are often sold to us through commercials that drive us to believe we will feel better with them. The opposite is actually true.
You see people thriving every day, trying to meet their individual needs; wanting to be better each day, wanting more friends, more materialistic things, more of everything really. They strive for better jobs and more money in hopes that it will fulfill their happiness. It even gets to a point where these individuals feel weak, they compete with others, or they’re dissatisfied with themselves or feel naked without them. They’ve unfortunately been blindly led on the wrong pursuit through negative associations led, most likely, by their closest influences. Again, happiness doesn’t exist through external outlets, it’s strictly derived through living in the moment, appreciating what is and being yourself.
What I find most interesting is how difficult it is for the regular everyday individual to adapt to this very wisdom. People have been led to believe they will only be happy through having nice things, or bigger homes, or higher paying jobs. It’s actually quite a bit simpler to achieve than this. It’s harnessed though enjoying your everyday experiences. That’s it.
I know just as well as any other individual how difficult it can be to enjoy some of our most regular experiences. It makes its tough to find our happiness when obnoxious coworkers, friends or loud children stand in our mental path of happiness. The stress of the situation throws us off our spiritual path in life. It annoys us and Ultimately changes our perspective of what actually is.
Something else I learned in the realm is; there are positives within every negative situation. This means you can generate happiness even during your most hectic moments. Even during your most difficult times you can harness positive qualities. In doing so you’ll generate a happier perspective of reality. This will enable you to be come a happier individual. Although it’s literally impossible to be happy 100% all the time it is possible to do your best to be happy even during everyday annoyances with ease. This means; with practice will come perfection. When a difficult time arises you can block it, enabling you to regain focus on your new-found happy reality.
Finding a mental balance when facing difficult situations is the key to surviving without psychological harm. When you can do this you can conquer your the next stages in your pursuit to long lasting happiness. The next step is gratitude and associating with top quality people.
There are plenty of negative influences among our every footsteps. These people are driven through negative associations. They thrive on acting against others: through stealing positions and possessions from others so they can feel better about themselves. These people feel a deep sense of validation through enlisting negative qualities into other peoples lives. They strive on taking advantage of people any way they can, or through robbing their victims of their innocence. They often teach their friends their negative motives just by being around them. Unfortunately, they’re ulterior motive’s are always in line with negative values. This reflects on us thinking a lower quality perspective of reality. It taints our vision so badly that it conflicts with the way we see ourselves. Just by synching to their ways our morals, beliefs, desires, ambitions, and literally everything positive about you is persuaded in a negative fashion. Ultimately, it leaves you feeling poorly about yourself. It damages you in more ways than you might believe. In addition to breaking you down, it encourages an unhealthy lifestyle which only breeds more negativity for yourself and your peers. It’s an unhealthy negative downward spiralling effect. The only defence is to associate with people who are in line with your individual values.
We are all in pursuit of something. Neither of us are satisfied with who we are and what we have. In my discussions with various people; my friends, my own family members, my students, and everyday individuals, I’ve seen their disappointment. I’ve learned to understand their hurt and their pain. I’ve seen their struggles in life. What I’ve noticed is that everyone feels the exact same pain. We all go through the same emotions, we experience the same type of trauma, we learn the same type of lessons just in different form. We are all fighting the same battle in this lifetime. If we are only able to come to terms with all of this we will start to refresh our mindset enabling us to work towards a healthier perspective. This can be done through being grateful.
The next step is gratitude. This is the simplest form in the realm of finding happiness. Being grateful is the easiest way to increase happiness. Just by stating what you’re grateful for will ultimately make you feel better about yourself. Often times, we lose focus, or we forget about all the things we’ve accomplished; business and personal goals, pursuing our passions, etc. We forgotten how far we’ve come already. Our hectic lives have led us away from what’s truly important, and we’ve now realized we are so far from happiness it’s daunting. Feeling grateful for what you already have will surely persuade you to think in positive terms. It will encourage you to believe in yourself again. It will lead you back on your path towards finding happiness. There are a variety of ways of being grateful. I recommend the following.
I recommend you say a simple “grateful phrase” out loud to yourself every day. You can state this phrase in your car on the way to work, in the shower as you get up in the morning, literally anywhere. This phrase is actually more of a statement. It expresses everything you are grateful for in life. Here is my grateful expression that I say to myself each day. I usually say it in the shower or any time I’m feeling down. I recommend you write something similar that equates to your current reality.
I’m grateful for my life and everything within it. I’m grateful for my children. I’m grateful for my wife. I’m grateful for my parents and siblings. Each who’ve provided support, joy and wisdom throughout my life. I’m grateful for all my accomplishments. I’m grateful for all of my experiences; both the bad and the good because each one led me to understand myself better. I’m grateful who I’ve become and who I want to be.
The first step in finding happiness is understanding that you’re currently lacking in the area of happiness. After you can acknowledge the very fact that you aren’t happy you’ll start unfolding key messages that pertain to your individual happiness. Once you start unfolding the answers to who you are as an individual, outside of your everyday influences, you’ll realize you harness unhealthy qualities, such as thinking negatively when you should seek the positive. This, in turn, creates a negative downward spiraling effect of negativity which throws your perspective of reality completely out of whack. When you can come to this realization you will start unfolding the necessary qualities that are pertinent to living in abundant happiness.
We all are seeking happiness and neither of us wants to suffer. Those are two qualities we each share. The rest is for us as individuals to seek. Although we all physically want something different in the realm of it all, it all comes down to one simple step – living in the moment.
Living in the moment includes but is not limited to; spending time with your loved ones – your friends, family, people you associate with. It’s a part of our everyday experiences actually. As mentioned before, living in the moment is really just finding ways to appreciate and be grateful for the current moment you’re living. It is very possible to find the enjoyment within every one of our experiences, even the difficult times. It is absolutely possible for anyone to harness the true meaning of “living in the moment” that I speak of. It’s really all a matter of perspective. It’s all in your mind.
You can eliminate the negative catastrophe that clouds your mindset by attaching onto the positive values and qualities of your life. You can choose to do this by being assertive and expressing yourself differently than the rest. You can do this by generating a completely different perspective of how you see reality. You will see your life blossom when you take the initiative to do so. You can start by being grateful for what you’ve already accomplished in your life.
Everything you’ve ever wanted is all within your grasp. It’s all a part of the mentality you haven’t quite tapped into yet.
That’s all I have to say about that.